Tweet Chat: On Thursday, February 28, at 2 PM ET Fem.2.0 will host a Tweet Chat with special guests, Cindy Cooper, creator of  ”Words of Choice“,  and   feminist writer, Soraya Chemaly ,  to discuss  how important it is for women to keep fighting for their reproductive rights and the role the theater plays as a vehicle to transmit the pro-choice message. You can join the conversation at #WoClive.

There is No Such Thing as Traditional Activism: Pro-choice Production “Words of Choice” Offers New Venue for Social Justice in an Engaging Theater Experience

The pro-choice movement is vocal in many areas. You see us spreading awareness on blogs and twitter, we’re on the streets and you probably see us tabling at events; but on the stage? That might be a new one for a lot of us. “Words of Choice”, a dynamic pro-choice theater piece is bringing its show to New York City this March in honor of Women’s History Month and the 40^th anniversary of Roe v. Wade. “Words of Choice” weaves together dozens of stories of reproductive rights through poetry, spoken word, oral history, theater and journalism.  It is performed by three actors, and showcases a variety of serious, comedic and contemplative pieces.

“Words of Choice” is not new; since 2000 the show has maintained its home base here in NYC, as well as toured across the country. What’s particularly exciting about its next performance is its inclusion in the first ever WiredArts Fest. In addition to the two performances in NYC, the show is available via live-streaming to audiences across the nation and the globe, where it will be showcased to hundreds of activists with the shared goal of reproductive and social justice.

We all know that women’s rights and reproductive freedoms are still under attack. As activists and ambassadors of change, we need to remain united in shifting that tide. Those involved in the “Words of Choice” production are committed to moving public sentiment and influencing policy makers. The production was created as a way to use the theater as a vehicle to transmit the pro-choice message. Using the stage as a venue for activism offers the opportunity to open hearts and minds, all while empowering the movement for women’s full equality and rights.

It’s not too late to get involved – “Words of Choice” will be performed on March 1 at 7 pm EST and March 2 at 3 pm EST at The Secret Theater in Long Island City. As part of the WiredArts Fest, the live streaming audience will be able to participate simultaneously with tweeting, instant messaging, photo shots and Facebook. If you can’t make it to the show, check out the streaming and get your voice heard using the hashtag #WoCLive.

Panel discussions will take place after both shows: Friday night will feature Amanda Marcotte, blogger at Pandagon, writer at RHReality Check, and author; joining us on Saturday is Lynn Roberts, founding board member of SisterSong Women of Color Reproductive Justice Collective and an assistant professor at Hunter College.

More information on tickets or setting up a viewing party can be found at www.wordsofchoice.org. Special discounts for activists are available by emailing: wordsofchoice@mindspring.com.

As someone who saw the show for the first time last year, I really enjoyed the opportunity to do something fun with my favorite pro-choice buddy; I highly recommend seeing the show, either in person or via the live-stream!

Ashley Paskalis is an activist, both professionally and voluntarily. She believes in and works towards social justice and women’s rights. As a healthcare communications professional, she often finds herself at the forefront of controversial modern day issues such as reproductive rights and medical research. Ashley is a feminist, member of Planned Parenthood NYC’s activist council, and an advocate for raising awareness and support for people living with HIV/AIDS. Her mission is to take a stand against injustice and make a difference in her community.

Photo credit “Words of Choice”

The second thing I always do when I get home is examine the side of the refrigerator.  Yes, six years after her youngest child graduated college and moved to another city, my mother still cuts out articles from the Economist and the New York Times and pastes them to the side of the refrigerator for her family to look at, learn from, debate, and discuss.  Growing up, Sunday dinner conversation inevitably revolved around these articles and comics and features.  With four women in the house – my mother, two sisters, and me – all of us having attended women’s colleges, the “side of the refrigerator” ended up being almost exclusively about women – a “how-to” guide on women’s leadership in the corporate world, an in-depth interview with one of the only female Supreme Court justices, a timeline of voting rights granted to women around the world.  Understanding the world and my place in it as a woman was central to my early years.

When the election was over in November 2010, the campaign I had worked on sadly folded away its ambitions as each of us said goodbye, great work, and see you on the trail next time.  I wasn’t sure what direction I wanted to go in next, only that after 3 years of working in politics, it was time to do something a little different.  I started following @Fem2pt0 on Twitter, and just a short few weeks later, I saw a call for bloggers.

I’ll write while I job hunt, I thought.  Fem2.0 cofounder Katie Stanton welcomed me on to the blogging team, along with Christina Black and Maggie Arden, both new recruits.  Once a week, I wrote about anything that struck my fancy – gender roles, women in Sudan, sexual violence in war, iphone apps to track women’s menstrual cycles.   I threw myself into it, and allowed myself to fully examine and explore aspects of my life that I hadn’t had the time or inclination to before.

Six  months later, Katie left Fem2 to pursue other opportunities, and Suzanne Turner, the funder behind Fem2, invited me to take her place as Editor.  I quickly learned that there is no such thing as taking the place of another who has done so much so fast with so little.  But I worked hard.  Fem2 changed – I invited younger, newer bloggers onto the team, and we explored not just public policy, but also political representation, marriage customs, media and advertising and film, and global women’s rights.  We toyed with the idea – several times – of narrowing the scope of the Fem2 blog to include just a few topics, but we quickly discarded the idea.  There were simply too many things we had opinions about, too many issues we wanted to share our perspectives on, and too may words bursting from our fingertips, to try to contain it all in just one or two topics.

It is now 18 months later, and the Fem2 community has become as much my home as any other ever has been.  The bloggers are my friends, the listservs and the conversations and the Twitter chats are my intellectual stimulation, and the writing is my teacher – my way of understanding the world around me and my place in it.  Our Facebook and Twitter communities have almost tripled, and we have over a dozen bloggers contributing regular content to the site.  We’ve initiated partnerships with other blogs like Role/Reboot, Abortion Gang, and Feminists for Choice, and have provided a platform and safe space for our members and friends to discuss the issues that interest them.  And some point, one has to wonder – what more can I do?

This week is my last serving as Editor of Fem2.0.  I hope to continue to blog, but the time has come for me to pursue other long term interests.  This afternoon, I will leave for Europe to vacation with my sister, and then I hope to return to the campaign trail.  The election is now less than 100 days away, and there are too many fights on the ground that need fighters – passionate idealists in the way that young people seem to naturally be.  It will be a hard break.  Even while I am away, I wonder whether I will itch to write about Amsterdam’s Red Light district, or Switzerland’s Gender Equality policies.  But if I do, I will try to resist.

Not because such things don’t need to written about, explored, discussed, and debated.  But because we’re all human, and sometimes, we need a break.  Every movie I see, every song I hear, every encounter I have with a man or woman now, I question.  What can I learn about gender and about women’s lives and roles from this movie/song/experience?  And I find myself exhausted.  Because every day I am sending story prompts and blog ideas to our writers.  My google alerts explode with stories of abortion, sexual violence, rape, women’s leadership, female genital mutilation, gender based violence, and so much more.  My mind is in constant whirlwind, thinking about such things all the time.  And I wonder if perhaps I have forgotten how to enjoy the life I’m so privileged to be able to lead.

The second thing I always do when I come home is read the side of the refrigerator. But the first thing I always do when I come home is take a walk through the first floor of our house.  I take deep breaths in the living room – my father sends my mother flowers on the first day of every month, and their aroma pierces the air with sweet remembrance of a long-endured romance.  I gaze at the photo collage of my older sister’s wedding in the foyer, how her dress sparkled as she married the man of her dreams and now, reality.  And I make my way to the sunroom, where I spent countless hours at the piano growing up.

I was never much good.  One sister had more musical talent, the other could sightread.  I simply loved music.  And I loved the challenge that my fingers always presented when I focused on nothing else for an hour – two sometimes – trying to achieve a perfection that felt that it was right in front of me.  There’s something magnificent about sitting down with nothing, and two hours later have a tangible accomplishment to appreciate.

And so the first thing I do when I come home is make my way to the sunroom.  As I open the piano and graze my fingers across it, I hear the echos of Louisa May Alcott’s Little Women, when Beth comes down the stairs after being ill for so long and “loving touched the black and white keys.”  Lovingly, yes.  But also with challenge, commitment, promise.  I look upon those keys and know that for however long I am in my parents’ house – be it an afternoon or a weekend or a month, I will find time with my piano to make music.

There are many more and many other types of challenges that will occupy my time and attention now.  Some, like music, I’ve neglected these past few years as I’ve started my young professional life here in DC. Others, like race relations and homelessness and other social justice issues, will be for me to explore.  All, I hope, will expand my horizons

Serving as Editor of Fem2 has been one of the greatest challenges and  joys of my life, and I’m sorry to let it go.  But the blog has dreams to chase that require more sophistication, more experience, and more vision than have I, and sometimes the best thing to do with something you love is to know when to let go.

Violet Tsagkas – a longtime member of the Fem2.0 team – will be serving as interim Editor as the blog and its leadership make the impossible but exciting decisions about where to head next.  She can be reached at Violet@turnerstrategies.com.

In just a few hours, I’ll be on a plane to Europe.  I’ll follow you all from there, and then as well from the campaign trail, wherever I end up.  You can follow my adventures on my personal blog, Left Standing Up.  And please don’t hesitate to reach out for good conversation, a nourishing meal, or shared fellowship.

Au revoir.

With love,
Abby

On Saturday, April 28, in the shadow of the 60 Centre Street courthouse engraved with the words, “The true administration of justice is the firmest pillar of good government,” a crowd of over 500 people assembled. It was a gathering that was part of a network of events taking place across the nation, put into play by Unitewomen.org.

Two women co-founded the grassroots organization. Karen Teegarden (Michigan) and Desiree Jordan (New York) connected online. They were alarmed by the rapid erosion of women’s rights. The distance between their home states did not deter them from a motivation to do something. They created a Facebook page called United Against the War Against Women, with the theory if they built it women would come.

I was able to interview Jordan about the demonstration she had spearheaded. It “began” for her on February 19, 2012,  as she watched the hearings on birth control led by Rep. Darrell Issa. “I was in shock,” Jordan told me. “They decided to drag my uterus onto Capitol Hill without reading me my Miranda Rights. I realized if I don’t do anything, I will be wrapped in a blanket of complicity.”

The day commenced at the site of the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory with approximately 800 in attendance. A walk down Broadway led to Foley Square where politicos, celebrities, and activists addressed, entreated, and revved up listeners from 1:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m. The conversation covered women’s rights, health concerns, economic security, and the nightmare that would ensue if complacency took precedence. There were placards embracing sentiments such as, “We Will Not Be Marginalized,” “Keep Your Laws Away from My Uterus,” and one held by a man,  “GOP: Get Your Hands Off Our Women.” My personal favorite was, “Probe Banks, Not Women.”

Stand-up comic Leighann Lord served as the “mistress” of ceremonies, and provided humorous and rousing transitions between presenters. Next up was actress Martha Plimpton. Emanating intense energy Plimpton began, “I am a United States citizen and I vote.”

She continued, “Women have always been at the forefront of progressive movements. Women can be depended on when you need bodies in the streets for women’s rights and human rights. We’ve been asleep. This hasn’t happened overnight. They want to gaslight us. All we have to do is look at their policies and we know we’re not crazy.” Mentioning the number of bills that have been passed against women’s reproductive health, Plimpton demanded, “Get loud, people!” Before her allotted two minutes were over, Plimpton underscored, “We will be engaged. We will be vigilant.” She ended on the refrain, “Who owns your body? You or the state?”

Representing the Religious Coalition for Reproductive Choice, Rev. Matthew Westfox articulated the need for the separation of church and state. He suggested that the loudest groups were using religion to coerce others—rather than respecting “individual conscience.” He stressed, “When people use the name of God to control women, it is blasphemy.”

Colia Clark, who was a Special Assistant to Medgar Evers, communicated emotively about taking the fight back to the streets. “The nice ways have always failed,” she said. “Sisters, let’s put our feet where our voices are. We won’t turn back until America is free.” Clark pointed to the challenges of women of color, asking, “Where do we go from here?” She answered her question with the statement, “Everybody’s got a right to the tree of life.”

Denarii Monroe was wearing a shirt emblazoned with, “The most dangerous place for a black child isn’t in my womb—it’s in the Congress.” She related to me her role in the day’s events. “I’m here as one of the organizers because simply believing isn’t enough. We have to make our voices heard through action.”

Anne Klaeysen, from the New York Society for Ethical Culture, drilled down on the disconnect between America’s international posturing and actions on the domestic front. She said, “Shame on our country for preaching democracy and freedom around the world, but denying equal protection under the law to over half of its population.” Klaeysen also called out “sisters of privilege and complicity who do not join us!”

The last hour featured those who are trying to move the needle through their writing and activism. Gerit Quealy highlighted the importance of women knowing their history and the “women you stand on the

shoulders of.” Referencing the subtext of divisions among women, Quealy said, “When you look at women next to you, you can’t be in competition if you are holding hands.”

Jasmine Burnett, of Raising Women’s Voices, Trust Black Women, and Sister Song NYC, was dynamic—as she picked up Quealy’s thread. “We have a lot to be pissed off about today. Black women. Queer women. I stand before you talking about oppressions inside our own movement. We are in this together. To sustain our movement, we need support. Stories can not be invisibilized. Where is the health equity in black women not getting the health care they need?” Pausing for emphasis, Burnett noted, “This country doesn’t give a shit about a baby once it gets born.”

There was consistent, verbalized incredulity that in the 21st century women were refighting old battles that were supposed to have been won.  Barbara Grufferman said, “I’m almost 56, and I can’t believe I still have to write articles about this. It’s crazy. I‘m here for my daughters. We must make the promise that this doesn’t continue. I have a vote and I’m not afraid to use it.”

Fresh off of an appearance on that morning’s Melissa Harris-Perry Show where she discussed her article, “Why Do They Hate Us?”– Mona Eltahawy addressed the commonality of the repression of women in diverse cultures. She said, “I am Egyptian, I am American, I am a feminist. The Christian brotherhood wants to interfere with my vagina. The Muslim brotherhood wants to interfere with my vagina. I say, ‘Stay out of my vagina, unless I want you in there.’” Eltahawy demanded that representatives “stand up for women’s rights and human rights.” She queried, “Do the people who represent me here really represent me?” She also implored, “Go out and vote in November.”

One of the final speakers was a member of the upcoming generation. Shelby Knox, who is 25, recounted how she had started asking questions at 15. She has since pushed back against those who think that  “young women are apathetic.” She self-identified as a “forth-wave feminist, gender justice activist, and womanist.” Currently the Director of Organizing, Women’s Rights, for Change.org, Knox reiterated several of the issues that too often fall under the radar: the health challenges facing Native American women, incarcerated women who are shackled to beds while giving birth, and the rights of transgender people. “We must fight across the board,” said Knox, “or it is not justice.”

Although the hour was late and the crowd had thinned, Knox acknowledged those who had remained present and steadfast. “You are our warriors,” she said. “We are not the future, we are the now.”

This post originally appeared at Marcia G. Yerman and is cross-posted with permission.

American women need to be recognized as full citizens. Yes, women in this country. It’s me again, sitting in my office, by myself, saying that “equal enough” is NOT. But, I am not alone.

Tomorrow, Saturday, April 28th, thousands of women and men will participate in 53 marches and rallies for women’s rights in 45 states and the District of Columbia. These events are part of UNITEWOMEN.ORG movement against the War on Women. In truth, I don’t care what the sustained legislative assault on women’s rights by the Republican party is called. Nor do I care, actually, for the Unitewomen moniker, because although I am happy for anything that offsets a cultural preference to portray women as enemies, I believe that men and women who understand the importance and benefits of equality must work together. However, I agree wholeheartedly with UNITEWOMEN.ORG’s goals and intent. If you are not joining them, you should ask yourself why and consider doing it.

Why should you march?

Because women’s and girls’ fundamental rights, to privacy, to life, to bodily integrity, to chose when to plan their reproduction are being violated.

Because women can’t afford to nor should be forced to live their lives according to rules that assume they are dependent on men.

Because women and girls should not be punished, denigrated and publicly humiliated for speaking civilly and intelligently in their own interest or making their own choices.

Because boys and girls should be taught what equality, not entitlement, means.

Without fail, when I talk to people about gender inequality in the United States, someone inevitably says some variation of this: “Compared to other women, women here are equal enough.” First of all, women are not in competition with other women for safety from violence and freedom. Second, this type of comparison, with its echo of threat, is an unacceptable and irrelevant framework for considering citizenship and protection under the law. Women are citizens and should have the full rights and privileges of citizens.

We should. But we don’t.

If you are uncertain about what I am saying and think I am exaggerating the harm, consider the effect of one distillation of events: the degree to which the conservative “political” agenda requires that all women, regardless of color, faith, economic status or sexual preference, seek men’s review and approval before acting. (Those factors, race, economic status, sexual preference magnify the effect.) “Informed consent,” “permission slips,” wage policies determined because “money may be more important to men,” “man-up finances,” women’s health care being determined by all-male religious leaders and congressional panels, refusal to reauthorize the Violence Against Women Act because of homophobia (and racism). On and on and one: every time the baseline requirement for women to exercise their rights and live freely is the intervention and approval of men. This is not just unfair to girls and women, but imposes unreasonable responsibilities and pressures on boys and men.

Even the phrasing of hot button issues — “Mommy Wars” and “Slutgate” — are coded conversations that define women, their health, their choices and their incomes primarily in terms of their relationships to men. Those frameworks are unacceptable. These attempts to legislate the subordination of women are not just distasteful and embarrassing but designed ultimately to humiliate women and keep them in their place.

TO BE CLEAR: This is not a man-bashing exercise. I do not hate men. I hate inequality and oppression. This is about men and women being mutually central as humans and, together, fighting systematized biases against girls’ and women’s full engagement with the world.

All over the world women seek equality. Men and women, who understand this, fight against everything from subtle, cultural sexism to extreme and violent gendered oppression. Here, in the US, many people really do think women are “equal enough.” I am told we should “consider ourselves lucky.” I am not going to compare oppressions. Nor am I in any way dismissing the dehumanizing and life-crushing hatred that women face in too many places on the planet. But, because others are violently deprived of rights and life does not mean that we should be content with circumscribed rights and lives. Women should not have to be thankful for hard-won rights, be penalized for seeking to live better lives or have to settle for “enough” when it comes to equality. In theory, we are citizens with full rights.

Republicans would have you believe that the word “war” is not a valid way to describe the assault on women’s rights represented by the hundreds of bills (916 since January 2012 alone) and laws they’ve pursued or enacted during the past two years. This attitude is unsurprising. What is surprising to me however, is the degree to which these assaults reveal the Republican abandonment, when it comes to women, of three core beliefs of their own party, namely:

• Our country was founded on the fundamental principle that individuals have rights and freedoms
• Government intervention into the lives of private citizens should be limited
• Traditional values and freedoms of the American Republic should be reaffirmed

Either they are betraying their belief in, for example, individual rights and limited government or they are demonstrating that they don’t believe women are genuinely included in the definition of individual citizens with full rights and privileges. Time and again, women and their rights are made marginal and secondary to almost everything else and debated away as a matter of expedience.

You should march because this is unacceptable.

It is evident that conservatives do not believe women can be trusted to think for themselves and make their own decisions… about when to become parents, money, faith.. nothing. Instead, in almost every sphere of life, their agenda is designed to keep women dependent on the good graces of men and competing for the resources that men have traditionally provided and keep them vulnerable in the process. That belief seems largely derived from Complementarianism, a worldview of gender roles as different but complementary, in which there are requirements made of men (as heads of households and public life) and restrictions placed on women, who are essentially limited to childrearing. It is one thing for people to chose this model privately, but it should not be enshrined in law, imposed on everyone and enforced judicially and legislatively to undermine equality and freedom. Yet, like a slow moving train wreck, that’s what is happening.

As I said, it isn’t about individual men and their relative goodness. It’s about systematized bias, gender hierarchies and how power, responsibilities and rights are distributed. And, also for the record, before anti-feminist trolls come out of the commenting woodwork, I believe women should fight in combat in military wars. And, yes, I know, these systems are supported by both men and women. That’s how Complementarianism works. It’s a primary vector for ambivalent and paternalistic sexism’s cultural sanction and enforcement by women.

Writer Erin Solaro put it this way in a commentary on women and war and freedom:

“At the core of citizenship is the idea that the citizen’s body is hers and hers alone, regardless of sexual history, marital status or childbearing… The full citizenship of women is not just about the right to hold credit cards, buy real estate in our own names, have access to abortion and birth control and lead openly lesbian lives in which marriages and adoptions are legally recognized. These things are important in themselves — terribly so, to the point of sometimes being matters of life and death — but what they represent is vastly more important. They are part of a woman’s citizenship and freedom, the right of a woman to fully inhabit her own life and participate fully in the life of the polity (in this case the American Republic) as a public and private equal.”

You should march because women have yet to be recognized as full citizens, with agency in both the private and public spheres.

Photo Credit: David Jackmanson via Creative Commons License

The Twitter hashtag #IDidNotReport has been trending for over a week now.  After being started by an English blogger called “The London Feminist,” men and women alike have been taking to the social network to share their stories of abuse and their reasons for not reporting the crime when it happened.

But they’re reporting it now.  The tweets range from “because my parents said his touches were “innocent”, he just misses having a daughter” to “I always thought that I don’t actually have a story. Then I realized that I do. #IDidNotReport because I thought it was my fault.”

There are dozens of heartbreaking and telling stories playing out all over the Twitterverse right now, showing what sexual violence and abuse really looks like, from the keyboards and memories of thousands of men, women, and children all over the world.

One of the most touching parts of the campaign is the chance for anonymity.  Instead of tweeting your story from your twitter handle, you are able to log into a twitter account specifically for sharing abuse stories anonymously.

The shame and stigma attached to victims of sexual violence is global.  In some countries, the victim is seen as being dirty and no longer fit for marriage.  Recently in Morocco, a 16 year old victim of rape was forced to marry her rapist, a legal way of restoring her “honor” and exonerating him.  She killed herself by drinking rat poison.  In Western countries, victims are often simply not believed.  On every corner of the earth, the victim is blamed in a myriad of ways.  In essence, there is no relief.  And to make matters worse, even in countries that do recognize sexual violence as a public health epidemic, when economic and financial hardship hits, services for such survivors are the first to go.

Every single day, three women are killed by husbands or boyfriends.  In 2010, over half of domestic violence victims who identified as LGBTQ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer) were turned away from NY shelters.  Between 2005 and 2009, U.S. attorneys declined to prosecute 67% of sexual abuse and related matters that occurred in areas controlled by Native American tribes.

Here at home, such services are being targeted by right-wing ideologues.  While this worldwide epidemic of sexual violence attacks mostly women, but also men and children, Republicans in Congress are opposing the reauthorization of the Violence Against Women Act.   As I’ve written before, this legislation ”is literally the centerpiece of our national efforts to combat domestic violence, sexual assault, and stalking.  Since this bill was originally enacted, reporting of domestic violence has increased by as much as 51 percent.  To say that this piece of legislation is a triumph and a necessary component to our efforts to ensure the safety and security of our citizens would be an understatement.”  Reauthorization of this bill would improve programs to assist victims, aid prosecutors, and focus more time, attention, and resources on underserved communities such as those identifying as LGBTQ or Native American, both of whom are more likely to be victimized than others.

There’s too much silence and too much confusion in our communities and in our culture about sexual assault and rape.  We talk about it poorly, so perpetrators don’t understand that rape isn’t about whether they did or did not use violence, but instead, whether the victim did or did not consent.  We illustrate it poorly, so that our youth believes gender-based violence is cool, or sexy, or not a big deal.  We prosecute it poorly, blaming the victim for the criminal actions of their assaulter.

Why?  Why are we all so stigmatized, ignored, brushed over, and blamed when we do report abuse?  How did we get to a place where the safety and security and well-being of our citizens wasn’t the number one priority for our government, our society, and our community?

It is time to end the silence.  Join @Fem2pt0 and others at this Thursday, March 22 at 3:00 PM EST to talk about these and other issues. We’ll be discussing the conversation taking place at #IDidNotReport, but in order to respect the space of survivors who are speaking out, we’ll talk at a different hashtag: #EndTheSilence.  Only by bringing these stories into the light and by actively engaging in community discussion can we start to end the stigma, the blame, and the violence that too many of us are experiencing every day.  If you have ideas to promote, resources to share, or even just a concern about these crimes, check in with us at #EndTheSilence tomorrow at 3PM.

On this 39th anniversary of Roe v Wade, the guiding question for NARAL’s Blog for Choice Day is this: What will you do to help elect pro-choice candidates in 2012?

And this got me thinking about the famous JFK quote, “Ask not what your country can do for you — ask what you can do for your country.”

Indeed, isn’t it time that we all took action to do what we can to end the War on Women?

Here in Nevada, things are just heating up with a third attempt at a anti-choice ballot initiative. Because when the first round of two similar personhood initiatives (that were struck down in court) came down the pike… that just wasn’t enough. If you thought that Mississippi burned with the personhood debate, it looks to get pretty hot here in the Silver State (among several others) as I’m sure Republican candidates are going to start falling all over themselves to declare their absolute hatred of women’s autonomy over their own bodies and their access to health care in all forms.

Let’s face it, none of the Republican presidential candidates are even remotely interested in women having control over their own bodies. All of them are pro-life. You know so because they signed the pledge, after all. And from defunding Planned Parenthood to declaring all abortions illegal, without exception to codifying abstinence-only mis-education in our schools — it feels like the Republican primary season is merely a boot camp for the next throes of the War on Women, filled with vitriolic hatred for half of the people on earth. Despite his pandering this way and that, Romney is clearly anti-choice.

In Iowa, Newt and Rick Perry were tripping all over themselves to break to the front of the anti-choice line. And Mr. Ass Juice Santorum is so hard-core that his politics would have killed his wife, if he had successfully gotten laws he backed in place. Oh, and then there’s Ron Paul, who is an OBGYN himself (proof that the universe has a wicked sense of humor, indeed)!

Man, if GW was bad, how much worse are these a-holes going to be if one of them is elected president?

Sometimes when I’ve heard so much anger aimed directly at my uterus, it really starts to get me down. My mind ventures toward the macabre and images of The Handmaid’s Tale. Sometimes it feels like if we can get through this election cycle and still have the ability to choose which tampon we like, that will be a miracle.

So maybe that’s what this Blog for Choice Day is for me: A rallying cry! A pep talk through the interwebs!

It’s clear that 2012 will be a bloody one on the War on Women battlefield. We must steel ourselves for the fights ahead. But fight, we must!

What will you do to help elect pro-choice candidates? Maybe the question should be: What won’t you do?

This post is part of the Blog for Choice Blog Carnival hosted by NARAL Pro-Choice America in commemoration of the 39th anniversary of the Supreme Court decision Roe v. Wade.

Like many DC transplants, I had stars in my eyes and aspirations of changing the world when I moved to the city 6 years ago. I went full speed ahead, achieving my goals of working for national women’s organizations and finishing graduate school. I learned some hard lessons, most notably that building authentic professional relationships is a critical component of success.

I began seeking out opportunities to develop my leadership skills and to foster meaningful professional relationships. I joined and volunteered with various young women’s groups and participated in several leadership development programs. I gained a great deal from each experience but knew I could do more to improve myself and support other women working to make their own mark on the world.

About 6 months ago a colleague introduced me to an organization I had never heard of:  fem*ex – The Female Experience. She had recently completed a turn as a facilitator for their women’s empowerment class. She invited the members of the young women’s group I direct to take part in their upcoming event: Engage.Explore.Empower. When I arrived, I was struck by the number of young women and organizations participating. I knew that if this one organization was able to achieve so much, I wanted to be involved. I signed up for the 6th session of fem*ex.

On a cool September evening I made my way through the city to the first class. I was unsure of what to expect. When I arrived I was warmly greeted by a group of 15 women, squeezed into a cozy studio apartment. I felt a sense of relief and anticipation as we settled in for the 3 hour class. Our facilitator’s inviting manner eased the tension in the room. First order of business: setting the rules to make our community a safe space for sharing and self-exploration. Democratically agreeing upon the rules that governed our group helped to create an environment of mutual respect and trust. Our first homework assignment solidified my belief that this was no ordinary course.The task: select a drawing of a vagina to personalize.

Over the next few months our perspectives, perceptions and assumptions were challenged. We addressed communication, reproductive health, power & privilege and a variety of other topics through the lens of individual experience. Every class was a chance to learn about ourselves and each other. Every class was an opportunity to broaden our view of the world. By the time we got to the section on self pleasure and orgasm, we had the routine down: be open, be honest, be yourself.

With only a few classes left, I am humbled by the experience. I have grown as a person, a women and a leader. The course, especially the people in it, inspired me to truly know myself and support others on their own journeys. I came to DC to change the world.  fem*ex has taught me to change my perspective.

For more information on  fem*ex and their spring 2012 class schedule, visit their website.

Nikki Nesbary holds a Masters Degree in Public Administration and a Certificate in Women, Policy and Political Leadership from American University. She is the Director of the Younger Women’s Task Force: DC Metro Chapter, an all-volunteer empowerment organization for women in their 20′s and 30′s. Nikki currently works for GMMB, inc., an advertising and advocacy organization in DC. In her spare time, she enjoys yoga, baking and spending time with family and friends.

War can be an intimate experience, often in a deeply personal way, even though it’s a shared collective event.  People experience the physical effect of war through their bodies and perceive their emotional experience in their minds.  My grandmother lived through an occupation, and her strongest memories were of being hungry.  Of her brother being killed.  She never mentioned religion or politics because her experiences were rooted in her own personal survival.  Theoretical frameworks often fall short in times of desperation or intensity, when decisions need to be made in real life and real time.

The reason I am pro-choice, and why the fight to keep the right to choose is so important to me, is because I want to retain ownership of my most personal, intimate possession– my own body.  The title of Merle Hoffman’s new book, “Intimate Wars,” accurately reflects how the abortion battle occurs on terrain that is personal property.

Intimacy is closeness – a factor of proximity or nearness.  Some people say that sex is the most intimate physical act that exists between two people.  Sex can be the ultimate expression of love or intimacy.  But when sex is unwanted and forced upon someone, violently or non-violently, sex becomes the most intimate of violations.  A violation of the most sacred thing a person possesses – and in many ways the only thing a person can ever truly possess: our body.

Pregnancy, the state of a body being enclosed/engulfed/surrounded entirely by another, is also an intimate physical experience two human beings share.  To me, the intimacy of sex pales in comparison to the intimacy of pregnancy, of a person using the air they breathe, the food they swallow, and the blood their heart is pumping to sustain another.  So isn’t an unwanted pregnancy, violently or non-violently occurring, also an intimate violation? An occupation of intimate space that was not welcomed.

Sex and pregnancy are similar to war in that there are two opposing sides or experiences that contradict each other, as well as an act of moving into another’s personal space.  It seems absurd that there can be two diametrically opposed truths about the same set of circumstances.  But it exists.  To invite a person to share your body can be one of the best human experiences and yet to have someone do the exact same actions uninvited can be one of the worst.

Abortion opponents are insisting there is only one truth and one option that will work for America.  But like war, there are no limits to the messy and unclear factors that shape our decisions about our most intimate experiences, even those that are the most common.  The right to choose is a right each woman needs to have because only she can judge for herself whether an experience is welcomed or intruding, a pleasure or a violation.  No one should be forced to suffer a violation of their own body or have their bodies subjugated for someone else’s purposes – the ‘innocence’ of that someone else is not the point.

Legal and safe abortion allows women to choose the decision that is right for them.   It allows the existence of more than one universal truth, more than one option.  Choice is about preventing women from being forced to give up possession over their physical self because of other people’s theoretical frameworks, needs or desires.  The end (someone’s birth) does not justify the means (someone’s violation).  I believe each woman has the right to make her own decisions about her own body for her own purposes.

This post is part of the Intimate Wars Blog Series appearing at Fem2.0 and On the Issues Cafe January 17-18, 2012 in celebration of the anniversary of Roe v. Wade and the release of Merle Hoffman’s memoirs, Intimate Wars.  You can purchase a copy of her book here.  To submit a post for the blog series, please contact us, and don’t forget to follow us on Twitter using #intimatewars.

Photo Credit: Trevor Blair via Creative Commons License.

I am a believer. If I had to name my religion, it would be “Judaism-Islam.” As the believers of both religions believe in One God, my heart stays indivisible. It is a paradox. I cannot choose between these two religions, the two principals of my family (in which there are also devout but very tolerant Catholics). In recent months I have attended evangelical churches in France, not to convert myself, but to study the Gospel and Scriptures that I know very little about. I accompany my best friend, who is an evangelist.

Hold a Dialogue With Believers
Thus, in recent months my feminist “action” has taken place with people I meet in evangelical churches. I have learned a lot from them; they are very warm people. I listen and ask them what they think about the low status of women. Women find it normal: “woman is a help for man,” “with gentleness and patience, a woman can get everything from her husband.” But I cannot talk openly about feminism – if I do, my friend may be removed. So I ask questions, I ask them their opinions. And that makes us think together. Once, a woman I had never talked to said, during a meeting whose subject was “How to Avoid Divorce”: “You men you talk about equality, but these are only words. You never do anything at home, we are your equal when it suits you.” The pastor listened, and let this woman speak. An angry man left the room.

Here are some notable phrases I’ve heard in evangelical churches: “the woman is a gift that was created for man”; “women’s emancipation encroaches on the pride of man”; “a man waits for a small intelligence from his wife: that she doesn’t humiliate him, for instance”; “the woman has a natural impatience”; “the woman has the natural temptation to break free of the man, as man has the one to escape its responsibilities, so if everyone stays at one’s place, there will be no trouble.”

A Matter of Interpretation
In spite of the existence of this patriarchal society that has lasted for thousands of years, I continue to hope. Jews, especially Orthodox Jews, wait for the Messiah. Christians wait for the return of Jesus. In fact, feminism or even Communism is like religion: that is to say, it is a utopia. It is an ideal in which we believe and we hope.

I have experienced horrible things, but I know there is always worse. Some situations are unbearable and then only God can carry us: He is like a rock that I can hang on. When I take this into consideration I see feminism as a weapon that God has given me for my self-defense and to allow me to stand up. Therefore, feminism is my fight and my faith is my strength.

One wonders sometimes, “Is God misogynist?” In fact, God is the greatest feminist because, firstly, He is the largest in all good things; and secondly, according to the Scriptures, the first human being exposed to free will as well as the imperative to make a choice, was a woman.

This post originally appeared at Feminists for Choice and is part of the Intimate Wars Blog Series appearing at Fem2.0 and On the Issues Cafe January 17-18, 2012 in celebration of the anniversary of Roe v. Wade and the release of Merle Hoffman’s memoirs, Intimate Wars.  You can purchase a copy of her book here.  To submit a post for the blog series, please contact us, and don’t forget to follow us on Twitter using #intimatewars.

Photo Credit: Thomas Quine via the Creative Commons License.

The first time I  stood up for abortion rights was back in 1994 in the middle of a freezing cold North Dakota winter.  As I stood in the sub-freezing wind outside that clinic, being screamed at by a hysterical mob of religious zealots, I was terrified.  I had never even been out of town without my family before, had never been the object of so much passionate vitriol.  But, I had been simmering with anger ever since the first abortion doctor (Dr. David Gunn) was killed in front of his clinic down in Florida.

So, even as fear coursed through my shivering body, I also felt for the first time that I was doing something that mattered more than myself.  I knew that without access to safe abortions women die.  They die painfully and they die unnecessarily.

Outside that clinic, and later, inside the church where Operation Rescue was holding their sermons, I debated for hours with anti-abortion protesters and their leaders.

Back then, I was still a Christian (not a militant atheist as I am now) and so I debated scripture with Flip Benham of Operation Rescue and Frank Pavone, head of Priests for Life.  I tried to argue that Jesus was about love and compassion, that he was against death and suffering.  They told me back that it was a woman’s place to be silent and to obey their husbands and fathers.  I told them how women died in the back-alleys before abortion was legal.  They told me that women who have sex outside of marriage are selfish, wicked, dirty and sinful.

It hurt to hear these things.  Especially from a man wearing a priest’s collar, a symbol I had grown up revering.

But even back then, as a painfully shy teenager, I knew their arguments were wrong.  It was probably the first time I felt confidence in my own moral conviction over the word of an authority figure.

Looking back almost two decades later, I recognize that that weekend influenced me more than anything I ever learned in the classroom.  Those men, in their Christian fascist insistence on taking every word in the Bible literally, forced me to reexamine many life-long assumptions.  Fortunately for me, someone loaned me a copy of “Liberation Without Gods” by Bob Avakian which helped me sort much of this out

What I came to understand was that the anti-abortion movement really doesn’t give a rat’s ass about fetuses.  Sure, they will use the fetus to play on people’s emotions, but when you get down to it the entire anti-abortion movement is driven by biblical scripture.  In 1 Timothy 14-15 it explains that the only way women can redeem themselves for allegedly having caused “original sin” and the “fall of man” is by having children: “And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.”  This explains why every major anti-abortion organization is also anti-birth control.

Besides, fetuses are not babies.  They have the potential to become babies, but until they are born they are a subordinate part of a woman’s body.  They have no independent social or biological existence.

The anti-abortion movement really would be more accurately named the “forced-motherhood movement.”

It has now been 18 winters since the first time I stood up for abortion rights.  In that time, we have seen a dynamic where yesterday’s outrage becomes today’s “compromise position” and tomorrow’s limit of what seems possible.

Today, it doesn’t take an hours-long conversation with some of the most fanatical anti-abortion activists to recognize that we are experiencing an all out war on women.  Last year, 92 restrictions were passed on abortion throughout the country.  That shatters the previous record of 34 restrictions in 2005, under Bush.  On New Year’s morning a clinic was set on fire in Pensacola, Florida.  And Barack Obama personally upheld the decision made by his head of Health and Human services to ban over-the-counter distribution of Plan B (emergency contraception).

The “abortion wars” will not just go on forever in the background.  Eventually, one side is going to win.  Today, we are dangerously close to – and on a deadly trajectory towards – losing this war.

Yet, we do not have to.  There are millions and millions of us who do not believe women should be forced to have children against their will.  It is time we stand up and make ourselves heard.

In closing, I will skip ahead to the next time I will stand up for abortion rights.  And I will invite you to join me

Come to DC on January 22 and 23 to mark the 39^th anniversary of Roe v. Wade.  Every year, hundreds of thousands of anti-abortion protesters show their faces to the world.  They should not be the only voice.  Read and add your name to this call.  Give money to this effort.  And, if it is at all possible, change your schedule and get yourself there.

Women who cannot decide for themselves when and whether to have children are not free.  If women are not free, then no one is.

This post is part of the Intimate Wars Blog Series appearing at Fem2.0 and On the Issues Cafe January 17-18, 2012 in celebration of the anniversary of Roe v. Wade and the release of Merle Hoffman’s memoirs, Intimate Wars.  You can purchase a copy of her book here.  To submit a post for the blog series, please contact us, and don’t forget to follow us on Twitter using #intimatewars.

 Photo Credit: Paul-W via Creative Commons License.